Well, tomorrow is BC’s first day of 4 y/o kinder. We’ve been looking forward to it all summer.
His teacher has been amazing. She came to visit him at his early intervention centre, took copious notes, prepared all the paperwork for funding for an assistant and arranged a time for us to meet at the kinder with BC’s OT so we could see what alterations needed to be made, materials needed to bought etc.
We then found out a little while back that we’d got full funding for an assistant for all the hours that BC will be at kinder.
So last week, when we attended our orientation meeting, everything looked great. The room sems accessible, taps in the bathroom have been changed, his chair and other specialised equipment are all on their way. He got his little kinder t-shirt. He’s excited and he’s all ready too go.
It has all been so smooth and easy that I guess I should have known that somewhere along the way there’d be a gremlin in the works.
Well, the gremlin arrived about 15 minutes ago, by way of a phone call from BC’s teacher.
The body who are responsible for hiring and placing assistants in the classroom contacted her to say that they can’t find an assistant for BC as yet.
So now, with less than half a day’s notice, there’s not really much choice. I will have to stay at kinder with BC. And I will need to keep staying with him until they can source someone else.
This makes me so sad.
It’s not that I mind spending time with my son. Of course not. I love hanging out with him and I can’t think of much more fun than hanging out with him painting, drawing, singing, playing…
BUT none of the other kids will have their mum staying with them. And all of the other kids will notice that BC has his mum staying with him.
I know I am probably being oversensitive and overestimating just how much all the other kids will notice on their first day/week of kinder. I know they’ll mostly be too busy finding their own place in the group to be noticing too much about other kids.
BUT there’s more. I wanted to be just like the other mums. I wanted to kiss him goodbye, go off and have a (rare!) cup of coffee in a cafe. I wanted to come back and see his excitement about his big day of independence, hear all about everything he’s done without mum, look at the pictures he’s drawn and check in his lunchbox to see what he ate. But now, instead, I’ll be there. The whole time.
So we’ll both be missing out on something special.
There’s someone else who’s missing out – and that is the would be assistant to BC. They’re missing the chance to get to know a gorgeous boy and having a lot of fun with him.
I am sure it will still be just as special when an assistant is found in the next few weeks (fingers crossed!!!) but it’s a bit of a setback that it’s notworking out that way from the very beginning.
Ever the optimist, I am always able to see a positive – and that is I will be able to see first hand how accessible the room is and how integrated the program is. I can give the teacher and classroom assistant a few tips on managine BC’s walker and show them how he usually gets things done. All this will be very beneficial and in the long term, I am sure will be good for everyone.
So….coffee’s cancelled and I’ll be digging out an old shirt which will undoubtably be covered in paint by the end of the day! Anyone else want to join me for the hokey pokey? 
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oh, bummer. Not to worry too much though. I stayed the whole first term with Beaver (he only had someone to help out occasionally and change his nappy) and the other kids didn’t really mind too much. As I gradually withdrew my presence they gradually forgot about me – and the next year with new kids, no one remembered. It’s a bummer, sure, but in the grand scheme of life, it’s just a little blip. Have fun painting – and think of it this way, you will be such an expert on kids’ songs by the time your aide has been found.
Di,
I am really so sorry that you and BC miss out on that wonderous “normality” that you were dreaming about, my heart aches for you so fingers crossed they get an additional assistant asap so you can go for that coffee!
bron
Dianne, we are SO similar. I go through waves of distress/optimism about so many things, just like you do. I know just why you are so disappointed about not being able to do a “typical” first day. Sometimes, you just ache for SOMETHING, ANYTHING to be just simple, a simple pleasure. And “normal.” You just do. But I think, like you, I would have come around to the same conclusion: You can integrate BC into the classroom, and I’m sure he will be so reassured to have you there.
I do think you should have a talk with the head of the school (or whatever bigwig) for a more serious discussion about when an assistant will be found. It’s not as if they only just found out BC was coming.
Hopefully, they will find someone pretty soon. Even if it’s a couple of weeks, soon he will be enrolled in school with an assistant, and you will be able to have some much-needed coffee time.
Now, you put your right foot in….
Di – it is so frustrating for you and BC that you are being affected by other people not doing their jobs properly. However, just take the opportunity and run with it. Set up some good inclusive options while you are there, get them understanding how it can be done and… don’t forget to submit your timesheet at the end of the week
I would love to hang around with Mac more – kindy is a blast!
Thanks Heike, Bron, Ellen and Gina.
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We DID have a great time and you know, I was glad I was there. I just wish I’d known a lot earlier that’s what was going to happen. It’s just prepared myself for a different experience. Here’s hoping they find a new classroom assistant VERY SOON!
Oh and Gina, I joked with the lady from the funding body about my timesheet and she was most unamused. Apparently my time is not worth anything
Dianne
xo